Nothing was mentioned of the soul
When to death we march, time unknown.
Not a minute more or much less
Does the clock pause this game of chess.
Age comes fast while we’re dying slow
So low our chests, what faint glow.
When seated on an empty desk
Trembling in the hand, this I ask:
What’s age? What’s the prime number?
Is it today I will slumber?
Where’s my love and proof of genes?
The bloodline, veins and in-betweens?
Where’s the concrete proof that I lived?
Has time lied? Have I been deceived?
Where’s the end to this suffering?
Where’s the gratitude life should bring?
Born alone and alone I’ll leave
Funeral pyre, my reprieve.
Ashes of friends and their lovers
Ashes of books and their brothers.
These bones of mine, ashes they’ll be
Ashes to all things, land and sea.
Not with panic I move my pen
Or the busyness of a hen.
Life’s a test, none with the answer
We must -the energy- muster.
Yonder meadow, yester years
Bear and bring all fears and tears.
I excavated and found gold
But not gold I crave to hold
If only a hand in my bed
If only a bounce in my step.
Oh the head that sleeps in its stead
Knows not the regret of the dead.
My heart bleeds from self bludgeoning
It thought itself wise and cunning.
High I aimed and high I achieved
These misplaced aims, born treasures grieved.
This flesh and bone that wants a soul
To lighten the black of my coal.
Wings waxed like Icarus
No – longer – vigorous
Sadness with no control
Beats, beats, beats on my soul.
Laugh at the mad
Poison the land
Call all those that love mad.
Measure the heat
Count the feet
Of all that cry defeat.
Hold your dollar
Right your collar
Whether poor or baller
Leave those that cry
If not me, he can die.
Step on his heart
Call your wife fat
Spit on a lad like sand.
Is it clear our purpose here?
Or is it rumors that we hear?
Do we choose these paths ourselves?
These roads to these empty shelves?
Could the man from above predict
How his sheep would challenge his seat?
Is fate equally ill-fated?
By some demon life dictated?
Life’s not short and it is not sweet
When love in life we do not meet.
If I could find the words I’d try
To explain to you this deep strife
Such wicked deeds for earthly pounds
From my heart, escapes not a sound.
This old heart has journeyed quite far
But not far am I from a bar.
Down the dread and the loneliness
down my stupendous holiness.
This’s the God that man now worships
Me, myself and I, a service.
Ego ego, that ate my youth
the fangs that bit and poisoned truth.
What role! What goal? Oh – what control! Be not the mirror of my soul.
Is it perdition or Brahman
That will burn or bless mammon man?
I’ve been the wise but more the fool
you’d think I never went to school.
I was I, and hence love was not
If not, a taste I would have got.
If I could count all of my wealth;
it’d be a lovers smile and health.
Related: Three Men and A Wondering Son